Candyhenge, or The Little-Known Druid Years of Queen Frostine

candyhenge

photo by Toy Master, with permission

[note: it has come to our attention that our British friends may not have shared the joys of CandyLand as children. It is a board game peopled by fantasy characters like the beautiful Queen Frostine and the evil Lord Licorice. It was often the first game for children because the characters advanced by colored cards matching to colored spaces, with no numbers. And the story inside the lid of the game was some people’s first introduction to the fantasy genre.]

So here’s the plot: Queen Frostine makes an impulse marriage with the Jolly Rancher and together they decide to memorialise their love with a Stonehenge replica. Little do they know that over in the next kingdom a jealous Lord Licorice is breeding a race of sugar-eating bats . . .blah, blah . . . and then everything went horribly wrong! . . . blah, blah . . . happily ever after.

Who says we can’t write a screenplay? The truth is, plans for a Candyland movie do exist, and we doubt they’ll think of the exciting henge angle without our help. When someone sent us a link to this candy replica, we saw our chance to do some hinting. (We wanted Terry Gilliam to direct, but sadly it is not to be.)

Back to the henge. Ann from Heritage Key sent us the link to the picture, which is probably the most recently-made item in the Heritage Key Flickr group. We do like the colours and of course the juxtaposition of food on the ground adds that bit of squeamishness that can substitute for drama in a pinch. Score: 5½ druids. It’s just a ring of trilithons, after all, and it doesn’t quite have the charisma of sausage henge.

We think Hugh Laurie would make a great Lord Licorice! When you read this post, Hollywood movers and shakers, give us a call. We have more henge-movie ideas you’ll love!

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