Monthly Archives for January 2020

Moai Coffee, Thailand: We Have SO Many Questions!

Moai Coffee, Ratchaburi, Thailand: a meeting of moai, cyclopean walls, coffee, and of course Stonehenge. Seriously, humanity, how did this happen?  This is one of those instances when the Stonehenge replica gods seem almost malevolently whimsical.

We understand we may have a few new visitors to this site soon, after an advertisement in which Clonehenge is mentioned is shown widely, and this replica may demonstrate the Clonehenge aesthetic to the curious as well as any: contextless prehistory offered as entertainment, with a healthy side of cringe. Here at Clonehenge, this is part of what we love!

https://www.instagram.com/p/fHWaE_vUTW/

Apparently this Stonehenge has been around since at least 2013 (at which time there were sheep grazing through it, but sadly it seems they have disappeared), but somehow we did not get wind of it until last year. Up front, we want to offer real respect to whoever decided to go so hard for the ‘”so bad it’s good” vibe they have going there. Moai Coffee is an instant classic.

The business itself is a coffee and snack-to-light-meal stop on a popular route in western Thailand. In order to amuse and attract people it seems someone decided to give it an Easter Island head, also known as moai, theme. It isn’t clear just how many moai they have, but there are many and each is unique. Some are just big heads of various sizes, some show the entire torso. You can even buy moai mugs as souvenirs. Humourously the rest rooms are differentiated by a moai with a prominent mustache for the mens’ and a moai with brilliant red lipstick for the ladies’! This place clearly was created with the Instagram selfie celeb in mind.

How Stonehenge crept in there is as yet unknown but there is some confusion among many people about whether Stonehenge and Easter Island heads are related. Stonehenge replicas as far flung as Texas, Japan, and Illinois feature moai as accompaniment for reasons that have never been clear to us. Search ‘Stonehenge’ on Etsy and usually you will see one or two moai listed under that tag. There is also a horrible cartoon that shows a moai on one side of the world and Stonehenge somehow exactly opposite on the other side, with a body between them so that Stonehenge looks like its toes. People send us this cartoon often. (Please stop!)

Listen, we know there is a Youtube video of someone walking around Moai Coffee pointing at the moai and describing them as “stone men from Stonehenge, England” but we will not post that link here. He has been corrected many times in the comments, and besides we refuse to let it continue to ruin our lives. (Is it true that we gripped our heads in both hands and yelled at the screen the first time we saw it? I’m afraid that is merely unconfirmed rumour.)

There are cyclopean walls at Moai Coffee much like those at Sacsayhuamán in Peru, and a few photos show an ancient Egyptian motif in one area or another. We’re all about the Stonehenge stuff here, but the conglomeration of random cool-looking ancient stuff is also a phenomenon worth examining. Not by us, of course. Please, someone go examine it and get back to us.

As for the quality of the replica itself, we judge it very good. The shapes of the stones are rough and close to accurate, which is rare. There is no attempt to make them uniform, a common error, but instead they capture the ancient rugged feel of the real thing. We don’t know whether it is aligned to the winter solstice, or if the lintels are curved but it does appear someone made sure that the inner trilithon horseshoe points toward the three-lintel stretch, one of our favourite tests for whether a builder actually looked at the current Stonehenge when they made it.

This clonehenge gets the official Clonehenge stamp of approval. 8/10, would visit! We will add this to our growing list of large permanent replicas. We have enough left that we have yet to post to take us over the coveted 100 number, so stay tuned. Don’t forget, you can get much more wholesome Clonehenge content on our Facebook group, which is the most active, our Twitter account, and our Facebook page.

We’ll be doing a post about the advert we appear in before long. Until then, friends, new and old, happy henging!

Popovka, Crimea: Stonehenge on the Beach!

The clonehenge of this post is a large stone circle with lintels. There are trilithons and photos we’ve seen lead us to suspect that there may be a stretch of three uprights with two lintels shared among them, something we like to see, but we haven’t been able to verify it.

Here’s what we know: Popovaka, along the most beautiful beach on the Crimean peninsula was for years host to a huge and wild electronica festival called KaZantip, or Z-City. It drew the rich and young and fit of Russia and surrounding areas. At first it was held in a partially built nuclear power station, never completed because of Chernobyl. It outgrew that and took over the beaches.

The KaZantip Festival claimed to be a nation of its own with “viZas” and guards around it. Slender young women in scanty bikinis were encouraged to attend. Decorated orange or yellow suitcases had some place in it (?). The yachts of the rich could be seen moored further down the beach. Drugs of various kinds seem to have been involved. (The well-known quotation of former U.S. President Lincoln applies here: “People who like this sort of thing will find this the sort of thing they like.”) The festival has since moved on to other venues. As far as we can ascertain the 2020 festival will be held in Kemer, Turkey. But we digress.

The point of all this is that smaller electronica festivals linger on in Popovka and trippy, trendy things and people still show up there. And as we have learned and as is evidenced by celebrations like Burning Man, wherever the minds of people ignite and burn, Stonehenges arise like mushrooms. You see one result above.

Search стоунхендж (Stonehenge) and Поповка (Popovka) and you may find more photos of this modern monument. It is a massive, impressive structure.

Unfortunately I haven’t been able to find out any more about it. Who built it and how, why someone decided to build it, and exactly when it was built, all of these are mysteries. The earliest photos we’ve seen of it date to 2017, three years after the big festival left that spot for bigger venues. If I learn more, I will post updates on this page and on the Clonehenge Facebook group.

Until then, take time to relish the wonder of a Stonehenge built on the most beautiful beach in Crimea, playground of the rich and beautiful. We keep finding more of these Stonehenge-ish creations around the world (many more posts yet to come!), and, yes, it makes us laugh, but it has also been making us stop and say, “That’s funny.” It’s become such a pervasive phenomenon that we hardly know what to make of it. For now we’ll just keep finding and reporting them. We still have a little time to accumulate data before the world ends and we have to draw any conclusions!

We hope.

Find us on the Clonehenge Facebook group: Clonehenge: Stonehenge Replicas Unleashed, on the Clonehenge Facebook page, or on the Clonehenge Twitter account. Generally the Facebook group has the most activity. Find new henges (but be aware: we know just about every one in the wide world), take pictures of the old ones and post them, or make and post your own. We are what you’re looking for to distract you from the impending apocalyptic dystopia! When you need us, we’ll be here.

And until then or until next time, friends, we wish you some very happy henging!