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The Guerilla Henging Craze (and the Land of the Frozen Maple Leaf )

photo from this article

Happy solstice to our reader(s)!

Listen. We need to have a talk about, yes, guerilla henging. Everybody’s used to guerilla theatre and, more recently, guerilla crochet. But for years a hidden epidemic of Stonehenge building or henging has been going on without fanfare and without triggering any alarm in the unsuspecting public. Wake up, people!

It took this throw-away article on street art involving city-abandoned planters in (not surprisingly) Toronto (Ontario again!) to stir our thinking. It involves only one guerilla henge, but we know this is just the tip of the iceberg! [Note to Canadians–we used that as a common figure of speech. It is not, we repeat, NOT a cheap Canada/snow and ice joke.] This is not just a few flaky hengers, drifting along at glacial speeds, but a blizzard of henge creation that is crystallising now and is unlikely to melt at any time in the foreseeable future. *wink wink* [blah, blah, blah, Mounties, white bears, ice floes…]

Anyway, after a lengthy hiatus, we have been doing a little searching around the internet for new henges and the results are startling. Everyone is building Stonehenge replicas! We don’t mean stone circles, as we have explained before. That is a completely different category of creation. We’re talking about structures with lintels, meant to mimic Stonehenge itself. They are appearing in unprecedented numbers, from pre-made kits and models to instructions for junior hengers, to the usual alcohol-inspired henges and foodhenges, plus the mysterious henges that appear on lawns and in public places like mushrooms springing into existence overnight.

What is going on with people? The human race has gone into a frenzy of Stonehenge reproduction–those little worms that entered their minds upon seeing pictures of Stonehenge, or the real thing, taking over their wills as if they were wombs, and forcing them to give birth to Stonehenge’s children! There should be a task force on this or something.

But for now there is only Clonehenge. We are the voice crying in the wilderness, warning everyone of the danger of Stonehenge replicas eventually taking over every vacant square inch on the earth’s surface. Alas! We cry out but no one hears us. Our valient warnings fall on deaf ears. Et cetera, et cetera.

What we’re actually saying here, for those who are incapable of reading subtext, is–Day-um, ma peeps, git your asses out there and put henges in all the oddest and most surprising places. This is our time! Flash mobs are going out and guerilla henging is IN! Clonehenge wants YOU.

So once again we wish you happy henging! But please, some of you, be careful on the ice! You know who you are, eh?

P.S.: We forgot that we meant to use the word frightening in this post. Feel free to insert it where you will.

Cheesehenge, For the Sake of the Land!

photos from Laura Mousseau, used with permission

Well, after a long pause, which of course you know was caused by a freak double computer calamity because you follow us on Twitter, we are back with this excellent cheesehenge which you have of course already seen because it was our Friday foodhenge on Twitter back on March 5!

Laura Mousseau tells us, “Cheesehenge was created by Mark Stabb for a Nature Conservancy of Canada Ontario staff retreat (if you could link to the Nature Conservancy site for Ontario somehow it would be much appreciated!)” I suppose we could — [link]!. We’re, like, all in favour of the, you know, earth an’ s**t!

This is a particularly good cheesehenge. Observe tthe guacamole ground representing Salisbury Plain, inner trilithons that appear to be taller than the sarsens in the outer ring, and–la pièce de résistance–the careful placement of the inner trilithon horseshoe facing the the uprights with the three adjacent remaining lintels. Some observation definitely went into this, although we would not go so far as to say as someone does on the video (Oh, yes!) that it is archaeologically correct.

Cheesehenges, as we have said before, are among the commonest of henges, probably because cheese is capable of being cut into rectangular shapes and, of course, it is often served with alcoholic beverages, some of which appear to  have Stonehenge-generating properties. We have posted two cheesehenges before this. See here and here.

Score: 7 druids! If that seems high to you, you should know that we give extra consideration to treehuggers. It seems likely that the land was what it was all about back in the days of the original builders of Stonehenge, as well as over a millennium later in the days of the druids. Even today we all depend on it. Good to remember, people!

So kudos, Mr. Mark Stabb! Nicely done. The only problem here is all those people singing “dooooo” at the beginning of the video. Perhaps goofiness, in the end, is what makes the world go round. We sure hope so!

Until next time, whenever that is, happy henging!

Strawhenge: When You’re Ready to Bale!

photos from the website of the Dry Stone Wall Association of Canada, with permission

“Strawhenge is a conceptual installation of large straw bales constructed to celebrate the relationship between the momentary and the monumental.” So begins the text on the website for this straw Stonehenge replica. Strawhenges are among the most common large henges, and we haven’t been posting each one we find. But after reading this website we suspect we have stumbled upon some kindred spirits, and since we haven’t posted a straw or hay henge for a while, here it is! (Others: Strawhenge in Essex and Straw Echo Henge, and a great one we never got photo permissions for *sigh*, Strohhenge.)

It is tempting to quote large swaths of text and, well, we’ll indulge a little. John Shaw Rimington is quoted, “when looking over a field of large bales in a field. ‘It is compelling,’ he says ‘to imagine that these large objects, dotted all over the landscape, are not just dropped haphazardly behind baler machines, but rather, they have been carefully moved into position to conform to some greater planetary design.’ ”

The text continues: “He goes on to point out that, a universal and intriguing sense of purpose and meaning lies in each one of us, and is needing to be awakened. Strawhenge is a whimsical structure that allows the onlooker to yield to this tendency to see a field of large bales as something of a phenomena. The common is allowed to seem unusual. The familiar rural landscape becomes infused with newness and significance again. The relationship of the temporary, as represented by the straw, and the permanent, as implied by the ‘stone-likeness’ of the large standing bales, creates a powerful contrast.”

Oh, people, this is our kind of talk! It’s so fun to talk about the nonsensical in serious cosmic ways, because it’s laughable at first, but upon further cogitation has glimmers of truth. When you see a Stonehenge replica, you know someone was reaching for something, one of those deep-inside things we don’t believe in, let alone understand. And at the same time, let’s face it, they’re being very silly. People at play.

It is pleasant to note that someone did indeed look at pictures of Stonehenge and attempt to reproduce some aspects of its present condition here. The inner trilithon horse shoe does face the uprights supporting the three remaining adjacent lintels. And the north-south orientation matches Stonehenge’s, we’re told. We give points for that.

Score: 8 druids! They earned that last half druid when they wrote the site text. Nicely done! Thank you, Mr. Shaw Rimington, for getting in touch with us. We approve whole-heartedly of your conceptual art installation and find it outstanding in its field.

Har har.

P.S.: Hey, Brits, send in your snowhenges. We know they’re out there! Other citizens are welcome, too.

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