Chip Henges: They’re the Latest Thing!

Stonehenge with chips and mushy peas, by Prudence Stait

Stonehenge with chips and mushy peas, by Prudence Staite

This won’t be a long post. We just want to keep you informed, Gentle Readers!Lately friends have drawn our attention to a couple of chip henges, or as the crasser parts of the globe might say, French fry henges. And we want to share them with you here, to enjoy with a fine ale and perhaps some fried fish (or, if you must, a burger).

The one pictured above was created by artist Prudence Staite, not to be confused with Firefly‘s wonderful Jewel Staite. Ms. Staite also created a cheesehenge a couple of years ago. Perhaps we should interview her on the blog! To quote the article that featured the photo, “Ms Staite’s edible art was commissioned to celebrate Chip Week 2014, which is organised by the Potato Council.” It reached our attention via Visit Wiltshire and the revered friend of the blog Rian Edwards, and very nearly by author Mike Williams as well. Thank you to them all!

Perhaps Chip Week was equally the inspiration for the other henge we’re featuring in this post:

Chip henge from the BBC's Room 101

Chip henge from the BBC’s Room 101

Not having seen the piece from which this chip henge was extracted, we don’t have any context for it. But it was sent to us by alert friend of the blog Ms. Emma Evans. Thank you, Emma!

They are similar and of similar quality, but we would be amiss not to draw your attention to the lemon sunrise in the photo at the top. A definitive touch! The mushy peas are, of course, definitively British as well.

We will keep you no longer. You are dismissed to go on to more weighty matters, like trying out the Megabits beta, or, well, eating chips and drinking heavily. Chip henges are not worth spending too much time on. They just show how Stonehenge replicas are an integral part of the Zeitgeist. As Clonehenge should be!

Don’t be afraid to make a chip henge or French fry henge part of your Saint Patrick’s Day celebration. Not that Stonehenge has ANYTHING to do with Ireland or Celtic people, but chips are very good when you’re drinking too much. So, whether in your cups or suffering with hangovers, dear friends, happy henging!

Babyhenge! The Jelly Kind (Best We Could Do)

Jelly Babyhenge, photo and henge by Dave Dummet

Jelly Babyhenge, photo and henge by Dave Dummet

In honour of the Royal Sprout, whether he lives to rule or to banish the monarchy, we wish him and his parents and grandparents good luck and good health!

Oh, and we hope you like our new look. It is here to stay. Comments are welcome.

Blobs of Compressed Wonder Bread: Stonehenge Replicas Hit a New Low!

Stonehenge, the grand and mysterious ancient ruin of Salisbury Plain, thought by some to be the spherical temple with many offerings located in Hyperborea, as mentioned by Diodorus, has now been reproduced in the medium of compressed Wonder Bread, which, if you are not familiar with it, is bread in the same sense that coconut-scented shampoo is fruit. But there it is: you can see it above. A crumby little Stonehenge. Sigh.

This is not to say that the artist, Milena Korolczuk, has not been very clever in creating her Stonehenge de pain, her megaliths o fara, her ancient stones van brood. Of course very few people would be able, or would want to create a careful little sculptural sketch like this from such an unorthodox substance. It is brilliant in its own way. We applaud her.

Score: 6 druid. Six tiny little crumbly stale druids. We had put them at the back of the shelf the first summer we started Clonehenge and forgot about them all this time, but here is the perfect way to use them. We don’t even have to brush the cobwebs or mouse dropping off of them. There, little fellows, off you go!

What’s interesting about this for our purposes, if you look at the page it came from, is that except for a depiction of the earth, all of the other sculptures are human portraits. Stonehenge is the only monument or icon, or anything. Which brings us, as always to the question that echoes down the centuries of posts amassed on this now millennia-old blog,

WHAT IS IT ABOUT?

No, that’s not it. What is it? Let’s see…

WHAT IS IT ABOUT STONEHENGE????

Yes, thank you. That’s the one precisely. What is Stonehenge doing to us as a species? Why do people stuck in Antarctica build snowhenges? Why do people drinking wine make cheesehenges? Why do people at the beach make little Stonehenges from odd roundish stones? Why do rich people build full-sized Stonehenges, and regular people build those odd one-trilithon henges? Why, when people build odd things from stone that don’t look like Stonehenge AT ALL, do they call them Stonehenges?

People laugh at us when we say that Stonehenge has a secret force that in a sense lays a psychic egg in the minds of those who loom at it, forcing them to reproduce it in some form at a point in the future. But tell us, oh you mockers and laughers, how do YOU explain it? What dark forces are at work that has created Stonehenges on every continent? That has forced scientists and artists and students and real estate agents and all sorts of people with little in common to reproduce it in countless forms? We leave this question here for you to ponder.

As for what we want, we ask for two things, two forms of Stonehenge now that we have our inflatable bouncy Stonehenge that once was only a dream. We would like to see: 1. A Stonehenge replica, no matter how small, on the International Space Station, and 2. We would like to see an inflatable FLOATING Stonehenge, preferably of a good size. These are our dream henges. See what you can do. You aren’t busy with anything important. You don’t fool us.

The world shambles on in strange lurches, its rhythms forced by powers we cannot imagine, and when we try to site ahead, we see only dim inexplicable shapes in patterns of motion that defy understanding. Someday we will actually write a humourous blog, but until then, dear readers, happy henging!

 

 

We Order You to Like This Cheesehenge! (Not Facebook Like–REAL Like!)

Cheese or brilliance?

We want to like this cheesehenge by Prudence Staite. We really do. We should like this. Sigh. We order you to like it! Here’s why. It is well done with well-shaped stones. The inner trilithon horseshoe faces the remaining three-lintel stretch, which we always look for. Bluestones are included, and we believe the red cheese represents fallen stones…  So much has been done right!

We’re not certain what the crackers represent. Aubrey holes? Tourists? Hippies and policemen? And the strings of lights? No, thank you. Still, that’s not what holds us back. Maybe it’s just the angle and the photograph that make it seem so uninspired and uninspiring. We’re not sure. Maybe it’s just that it’s one of those henges that got a lot of publicity, while many brilliant ones get none or almost none. And that as a result we are forced to post it after the fact, just so it is included, even though everyone has seen it already.

At any rate, it deserves a good score. We award it 8½ phlegmatic druids. Of the many cheesehenges we have seen over the years it is by far the truest in detail.

We really do want to like it! Until next time, friends, get your henges in a row!

Achill Update and Pictures Without Stories

photo by seequinn on Flickr, used according to permissions

News on Joe McNamara’s structure on the Irish island of Achill, nicknamed Achill Henge. Mr. McNamara has been ordered to take down Achill Henge, pending a planning board ruling on whether the structure should be exempt from the need for planning permissions.  We like the last sentence of the article: “Locals in Achill have speculated that it is ‘unlikely’ that McNamara will take the structure down.”

We know, we know, it’s none of our business, and people have a right to have their laws followed, but we just want to know what it was for and what the henge was suppose to look like when completed! Plus, let’s face it, where else in the world is there a greater advocate of Stonehenge replicas than here on Clonehenge? Our motto: Bringing you global news and intelligence on Stonehenge replicas in the internet since 1784!

Signpost to Achill Henge, again by seequinn on Flickr (We love this!)

1784 was a good year on the net. We remember the first time we got Wolfgang-rolled…  But enough nostalgia.

While we’re posting for the first time in a while, we thought we would pass along some henge pictures posted for us by Facebook friends of the blog but without much provenance. If you can help by bringing us more information on these, please do. You can reach us on the Clonehenge Facebook group or at the email address on the sidebar.

A glass trilithon posted to the Clonehenge Facebook group by Bruce Bedlam of Stonehenge-is-a-building fame. Elegant.

and this cakey henge was sent us by friend of the blog Jez Reell. All we know is that it was created by Dominic Wilcox for Jaffa Cakes out of Jaffa cakes. What we like best about this is the reflection of the circle of trilithons on the plate. Well photographed! [Update May 8, 2012: We found the back story for this one here, thanks to Mike Williams--the shaman-y one.]

One more note before we go. We actually received an email from someone at CBS Sunday Morning, a news program in the States, asking to interview us in relation to a piece about what is real and what is fake. We sent our contact information, but they never got back to us. We now suspect that what they wanted was not an interview but a replica of an interview. They were right not to call back. Interview replicas would be a whole other blog!!

So keep your eyes open for new henges. Whether or not you are in County Mayo, have a good Saint Patrick’s Day tomorrow. And until next time, happy henging!

P.S.: If anyone knows the lastest news about or the current state of Achill Henge, a comment about it would be much appreciated. Thank you!

Happy New Year! Welcome to 2012, Year of the Henge!

photo and henge by Brock Davis

Happy New Year to all, and best wishes for 2012! Here is a link to the Google Image search for Stonehenge replica. Lots of images to enjoy there, and of course, that’s just a taste of what’s out there.

Will we be posting henges in the new year? That remains to be seen. But we guarantee that Stonehenge replicas will continue to be built!

We hope everyone will have a year of wonder, pleasure, and success, whatever that means to you. And until the next time, happy henging!

Spamhenge–May Last Longer Than the Original!

photo by Jedimentat44 on Flickr

This is not the only spamhenge, but it is a famous spamhenge, famous enough to have been a clue on the television game show Jeopardy. Yes, that’s right–Alex Trebek broached the esoteric topic of Stonehenge replicas on his show one fateful night! And we heard it.

Considering it is a spamhenge, it is rather well done. The stone shapes are correctly proportional and they have aimed the opening of the inner trilithon horseshoe toward the three lintel stretch in the outer circle. That counts for a lot as we said last week. We give this 7  druids, partly for the choice of material. Odd materials are in the Clonehenge tradition!

We believe this was created for the 7th Annual Chicago Spam Sculpture Contest. Which raises a lot of questions in itself. But on to our next Speedpost©!

Gourmet White Chocolate Stonehenge: It’s Good–Almost Too Good

photo by Bobby Yip from Reuters

Gourmet chocolatier Mirco Della Vecchia created this white chocolate Stonehenge as part of his Chocolate World Heritage show. Other sculptures in chocolate included the Tower of Pisa, the Colosseum, the Arc de Triomphe, the Parthenon, and the Egyptian Temple Abu Simbel. Each was reproduced in excruciating detail, down to the toes of the pharaohs, the crumbling of the Colosseum, and the shapes of the individual stones at Stonehenge!

We have been putting off posting this because, frankly, it is too good, and not in the true spirit of Clonehenge. What are we supposed to say about this? Complain about the lack of a ditch and bank or a heel stone? This Stonehenge model appears to be beautifully done down to the finest detail, although perhaps we should contact Mr. Della Vecchia and ask to have it sent here for closer inspection. And extensive tasting. Oops, we meant testing. Heh.

Our only other comment would be that we think he probably had the normal compulsion to do a Stonehenge but didn’t want to seem like a crackpot, so he did the others and called it Chocolate World Heritage in order to cover it up.

Score: 7 druids. We have deducted ½ druid for an absence of desirable wackiness. He could easily have added an alien or a replica Tardis if he wanted to achieve an 8. Lighten up, Mirco! But don’t worry–we DO accept bribes.

Still building suspense for the New Jersey personal garden henge. We can hear your hearts pounding! Both of them. So until then, Doctor, happy henging!

Citrus-Henge in the Riviera, Comes with its Own Druid!

photo from archaeology.co.uk

There are certain Stonehenge replicas that cause us to let out little chirps of sheer joy. The best example of one that made us insanely happy is, of course (as we are sure you will recall) the Taipei interactive Stonehenge sculpture. While the replica in this post doesn’t detect your approach or talk to you the way that one does, it is still squeak-worthy. Allow us to present to you… (drumroll) Citrus-henge!

Yes, ladies and germs, that is a Stonehenge replica made of lemons, limes and oranges. In France. We don’t ask for these things. Honest. People just can’t help themselves.

The story is, the French town of Menton, on the Riviera very near the border with Italy, has a lemon festival every year in late February and early March, featuring large floats with structures made of citrus fruit. Each year it has a different theme,this year’s being Great Civilisations. And there amidst the Babylonians, the Vikings, the Mayans and the Greeks, voila! someone did a Stonehenge.

Come to think of it, we may be burying the lead story here. Someone in France decided that something English represented a great civilisation. Of course the original was built over four thousand years ago, so it can’t be construed as a straight-on compliment. Wouldn’t be French if it were.

We would be content just to post a life-sized partial Stonehenge replica made of citrus, but there’s more. Oh, yes, my friends–your eyes do not deceive you, as much as you may wish they did. That is indeed none other than–a druid!!! Ya gotta love it. (these two photos courtesy of the carpe annum blog. Many thanks to them!) Clearly the message that druids did not build Stonehenge has not gotten through to people worldwide just yet. They did do a nice job on it, though, didn’t they? We wonder who got to keep that druid.

As to scoring, we are looking at a surprisingly well put together partial Stonehenge. The replica includes the three-lintel stretch from the outer circle, a slightly larger trilithon from the inner horseshoe, some bluestones, and what appears to be an altar stone. Someone also took time to give appropriately uneven shapes to the “sarsens”.  Considerable care and observation went into this. Well done. Score: 7 druids! We are even considering adding another half druid for the wackiness of it all. But they do have a druid already, don’t they?

Our thanks to friend-of-the-blog David Raven of Elmet Garden Services in West Yorkshire.  Thank you, David!  He’s very good with plants, everyone, and we encourage you to hire him to work the garden. A man in touch with the spirit of the land.

And until next time, folks, happy henging!

Cakehenges and Word Fields: the Plight of the Carbon-Conscious Blogger

photo from TheSugarSyndicate.com’s Flickr account
Believe it or not, we are swamped with new Stonehenge replicas of all sorts and you might think, if you were not in possession of all the facts, that we should be posting here at least a couple of times per week, if not every day. You could be forgiven for assuming we are just lazy.

But nothing could be further from the truth! What people don’t realise is that unlike other bloggers, who just use mass-produced letters and words, often imported from countries where they have been grown with pesticides by people who are paid sub-subsistence wages and who have no access to health care despite their crippling work, here at Clonehenge we personally grow every letter and every word ourselves, nurturing them with great care and at much expense.

This labour of love gives us precious little time for the fun of producing these posts for our adoring public, but because we know you are waiting breathlessly we tear ourselves away from the Palabra beanfields to craft these posts like drystone walls, turning and fitting each word and each letter until somehow they fit and balance to make the august edifice that is Clonehenge.

Today our topic is Stonehenge cakes, or cakehenges. The example above, beautifully done, was the 2007 creation of a Chicago-based bakery, The Sugar Syndicate, which is, alas, no longer a going concern. It is an outstanding example of the cakehenge genre, second only to our favourite, the mom-made cakehenge from New Zealand’s Vanda Symon.

photo by Siobhan Jess Sarrel

The confection in the pan above was posted on the Clonehenge Facebook page by reader Siobhan Jess Sarrel, about whom we know nothing, especially not how to pronounce her first name. She baked gluten-free brownies, used fondant to fashion the Stonehenge on top, and took it to a friend’s solstice party. (We do not know if Ms. Sarrel is in the northern or southern hemisphere, so we don’t know if it was a summer or winter solstice party.)

These henges have many things right with them. First, they are our preferred type–replicas of Stonehenge as it stands today. In both cases the builders looked at pictures of Stonehenge to guide their modeling. Both show the trilithon horseshoe and the three remaining adjacent lintels. Both show fallen stones.

The top cake is more accurate in scale and placement and also includes the bluestones. It is impeccable and professional looking. The brownies, on the other hand, are gluten-free.

This may not mean much to the average reader, but for us this is a huge factor. Not only are we at Clonehenge among those who are required for health reasons to eat gluten-free foods only, but it is a little-known fact that the original Stonehenge on Salisbury Plain IS IN FACT GLUTEN-FREE!!! Well caught, Lady S. J. Sarrel!

Scores? We give the Syndicate henge 7 ½ druids and Ms. Sarrel’s brownie henge a solid 7. We figure we don’t want to run afoul of any syndicate out of Chicago!

Well, it looks like we’ve just about run out of words that are developed enough to pick. We’ll have to let the fields grow a bit before we can post again. Here’s hoping the aliens don’t come by and ruin things with crop circles!

If you’re still hungry for cakehenges, find more here. And until next time, happy henging!

P.S.: What the hell is fondant, anyway? Yes, we know we could google it but the truth is we’re far too lazy. Oops.